[ Allen's hands gently trace little circles into Kanda's own as he looks down again. He gives a tiny sigh at that, shaking his head. ]
Saying it was luck implies there might be a world out there where you had missed me. I don't think that's true. I think... I think we would've inevitably always merged paths again. Not because of fate, just because... it's you. It's you, and it's me.
[He tilts his head forward and down a little bit to meet Allen's gaze while Allen's leaning back. It's a bit of an awkward angle, but it's steep enough thanks to their height difference that he can easily lean in and kiss Allen upside-down. Kanda can't explain what comes over him in that moment, it just... does, and they're parting before he can think further on it.]
It's you and me. [He echoes.] Yeah, maybe. It didn't stop me from wondering what would happen if I passed you by.
I don't... really know how much longer I would've lasted on my own, realistically. I could fight the Akuma. I could handle taking care of myself. I could make money and sustain off that. But... I... The loneliness was unbearable.
Which... is just a long winded way of saying I would've sought you out. If there is a world out there, God forbid, where you had missed me... I would've found you.
[ If that Allen exists out there, though, he thinks maybe he'd have had a mental break unlike anything Allen knows, but... it's better not to think about that part. ]
And would you run off like you tried to? Or would we have gotten a "hello" that time? [He teases, entertaining the hypothetical just for the moment.] Would you have came out of nowhere to save our asses and then ran before I could get to you again?
[ Allen opens his mouth to immediately answer with an “of course I wouldn’t,” but he pauses to genuinely consider this. He looks out to the running water of the river, just feeling Kanda’s heartbeat against his back as he quietly considers things. ]
Probably. [ He finally answers, only slightly somber. ] Even if being alone scares me, hurting those I care about scared me more. I was so sure — so damn sure that the only solution was to push you all away so that wouldn’t happen. Even now, I can’t say I’m proper convinced it’s not.
The only difference now is that the thought of being alone again scares me more.
[Yeah. That tracks. He knew that would be the answer, as idyllic as it would've been to hear Allen say yes he'd stay and no it wouldn't require putting a zappy little bracelet on him this time. It's a nice thought.
Kanda leans back over Allen upside down again, a curtain of hair partly covering them both thanks to the looser way Kanda wears his hair today.]
Don't run away from me anymore.
[He mutters, holding Allen the least bit tighter.]
[ Allen gives a little sigh, but he’s… smiling. Soft — in that way that conveys more appreciation and affection. He doesn’t respond immediately, slouched just enough that he’s able to look up at Kanda easily now.
Eventually, he picks up his hand with Kanda’s, then guides one of his fingers to drawing an “X” right over where his heart is. Then, after, he hooks his pinky finger with Kanda’s, holding it tight as he gives their hands that little shake that signifies contractual obligation. ]
[Ugh. This man has no fucking right being this goddamn cute. Kanda's so mad about it (he's not mad about it). After their pinky-swear is done, he sort of sits there with their hands like that for a second longer before flipping them around to twine his fingers over the back of Allen's own, sighing like he's so put out by all of this.
And then he leans in and kisses the other man again. Truly, a dam has broken somewhere because this is the most affectionate he's ever been with anyone in his God Damn LIFE. What is happening to him, did his brain fucking shut down?]
[ You won’t catch Allen complaining. His love language is definitely affection. He is so delighted he gets to share it with Kanda at last. Him and Link cannot escape him now, unfortunately. There really is a dam being broken and only physical touch is flowing now.
He grins stupidly into their kiss, squeezing Kanda’s hands. He stays there for just a moment before parting with a laugh. ]
There’s just the fruit salad left. I can eat that on the walk back home, if you wanna carry the blanket and stuff. I’ll even feed you, since your hands will be full~.
[ Hm. Allen adjusts himself so that he’s sitting upright again and cocks his head to the side as much as his can to brush his lips against Kanda’s cheek. Not even kiss, not really, just ghosting his lips against his skin for a brief moment before he speaks. ]
And… if I am desperate to get back home with you…?
[ Unspoken: I’ve eaten while walking plenty of times before— ]
[Ough. The way his cheeks start to turn pink. Allen, you can't just say that. Eating and walking sounds so fucking stupid, and yet he finds his brain not catching up to his mouth before he blurts:]
[Kanda is up. The basket is empty (thanks Allen), so he just shoves the blanket in there in a ball to throw in the laundry later. After that, the basket is slung over one arm and off they go, to hike back home while Allen eats fruit out of a bigass bowl and walks at the same time.
Kind of funny, that.]
Take your time. This was sort of... spur of the moment.
[ Allen is shoveling the fruit into his mouth, thanks. He is also not moving that fast because of it. He does linger close to Kanda, though, and occasionally pulls him back to feed him a spoonful. ]
Oh, I’m aware. You seemed almost surprised that you asked me at all! It was funny.
But I do want to. I’m right stupid when it comes to these sorts of things, though. I don’t know what constitutes as a date, for example. Like can we just take a walk together, or how about sparring at the dojo? Those don’t feel like dates, but maybe they are???
You think I'm not stupid about it? [He did not say that.] ...I guess it's... we just say we're going on a date and it turns into one. I don't fucking know. Isn't it supposed to be something we both enjoy doing?
[So sparring could easily be a date. That makes sense.]
Aren't there some other pansies here you can ask for specifics?
[Stop being cute. Stop stopping to feed him and then being cute and also being adorable. Fuck he hates you so much, said man who is eating off of Allen's spoon anyway and following after him and letting Allen into his space. Absolutely Allen's biggest hater here. Not charmed. Not smitten.
God people can see them, they're in the middle of the Grove there are people they can sEE THIS.]
[ Allen is swaying happily as he walks and eats — a happy “enjoying food” dance, basically. Sometimes what you’re eating is so good you have to sway about it. Every three bites, he’ll feed Kanda, until the bowl is empty. He’ll set it by the sink when they’re home. He leans over and smooches Kanda once it’s gone, though, going to hold the front door open for him. ]
[ He’s just gonna put the basket next to the bowl in that case. Tomorrow problem!! He wants to focus on Kanda now. ]
Oh, this is the most important part of the date, you see. After you’re done with it, you have to kiss your partner at least a hundred times more than you did on the date.
[Yeah, that's how that works, Allen obviously is quite familiar with the law for various reasons, Kanda!
Anyway, with their stuff in the kitchen (Link is going to have questions and Kanda doesn't give two fucks to answer), Kanda proceeds to walk out of it with Allen, give it about three and a half seconds, and then spin around in the hallway to kiss him.
Mmhm~ [ And, really, why would he not want to fish for more kisses, when Kanda is so eager to give? They're both still amateurs at this, and yet all the same, Allen is completely enthralled whenever their lips meet. For something small like a peck, or when they're really swapping spit, he adores this. Maybe it's the closeness to Kanda in general, or... perhaps he just likes the feeling. Perhaps he just likes to feel... loved. He's not certain. He doesn't read too much into it beyond "boy pretty, must smooch."
He flings his arms around Kanda's shoulders, standing up on his toes for the kiss. He wanted to wait to be in the room so they could both sit, but sure. This works. ]
[It's suddenly really hard to resist Allen. Why. He's been so good at it before?? (NO YOU LITERALLY HAVE NOT DON'T EVEN START) He's been so normal and heterosexual (Kanda you've pinned him to surfaces twice before) he's been well-behaved and has never done anything gay (Kanda). And now it's just...
Ugh. Hormonal. He wants to kiss Allen. They're in the hallway and not at all making it back to their room and he's kissing Allen, there are arms around his shoulders, and the angle that they're kissing at is steep due to the height difference. Kanda dips down a little lower to make it easier, and somewhere along the lines his hands are on Allen's hips and they're against a wall.
[ Part of Allen wants to pull away and tell Kanda what he's doing. He doubts Kanda has noticed, otherwise he'd be more flustered than he is. He can picture it now, though. He'd say something, and Kanda would stop kissing him and get all mad-flustered. It'd be cute, truly, but... what if he didn't say anything? What if he... lets this happen? What if kiss boy???????????
He'll move them to the bedroom eventually, probably. For now, he closes his eyes, kissing Kanda, and now biting his lip now that he's not on his toes. ]
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Saying it was luck implies there might be a world out there where you had missed me. I don't think that's true. I think... I think we would've inevitably always merged paths again. Not because of fate, just because... it's you. It's you, and it's me.
...
That's just what I think, anyway.
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It's you and me. [He echoes.] Yeah, maybe. It didn't stop me from wondering what would happen if I passed you by.
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Which... is just a long winded way of saying I would've sought you out. If there is a world out there, God forbid, where you had missed me... I would've found you.
[ If that Allen exists out there, though, he thinks maybe he'd have had a mental break unlike anything Allen knows, but... it's better not to think about that part. ]
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And would you run off like you tried to? Or would we have gotten a "hello" that time? [He teases, entertaining the hypothetical just for the moment.] Would you have came out of nowhere to save our asses and then ran before I could get to you again?
This didn’t show up in my inbox. Bullying.
Probably. [ He finally answers, only slightly somber. ] Even if being alone scares me, hurting those I care about scared me more. I was so sure — so damn sure that the only solution was to push you all away so that wouldn’t happen. Even now, I can’t say I’m proper convinced it’s not.
The only difference now is that the thought of being alone again scares me more.
I just assumed you went to bed
Kanda leans back over Allen upside down again, a curtain of hair partly covering them both thanks to the looser way Kanda wears his hair today.]
Don't run away from me anymore.
[He mutters, holding Allen the least bit tighter.]
No matter what happens. Even here.
I was up until like 1 dw is just mean
Eventually, he picks up his hand with Kanda’s, then guides one of his fingers to drawing an “X” right over where his heart is. Then, after, he hooks his pinky finger with Kanda’s, holding it tight as he gives their hands that little shake that signifies contractual obligation. ]
Cross my heart. Pinky promise.
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And then he leans in and kisses the other man again. Truly, a dam has broken somewhere because this is the most affectionate he's ever been with anyone in his God Damn LIFE. What is happening to him, did his brain fucking shut down?]
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He grins stupidly into their kiss, squeezing Kanda’s hands. He stays there for just a moment before parting with a laugh. ]
There’s just the fruit salad left. I can eat that on the walk back home, if you wanna carry the blanket and stuff. I’ll even feed you, since your hands will be full~.
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[And give him some—]
Eating and walking sounds like too much of a pain in the ass.
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And… if I am desperate to get back home with you…?
[ Unspoken: I’ve eaten while walking plenty of times before— ]
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Alright. Let's go, then.
[Maybe he's also a little desperate.]
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This was fun!! I’ll surprise you with the next date, okay? Once I figure out what to do for it.
[ Once Kanda is up, he’s grabbing the fruit bowl. ]
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Kind of funny, that.]
Take your time. This was sort of... spur of the moment.
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Oh, I’m aware. You seemed almost surprised that you asked me at all! It was funny.
But I do want to. I’m right stupid when it comes to these sorts of things, though. I don’t know what constitutes as a date, for example. Like can we just take a walk together, or how about sparring at the dojo? Those don’t feel like dates, but maybe they are???
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[So sparring could easily be a date. That makes sense.]
Aren't there some other pansies here you can ask for specifics?
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Besides, they’re something kind of fun facing the unknown with you.
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[Stop being cute. Stop stopping to feed him and then being cute and also being adorable. Fuck he hates you so much, said man who is eating off of Allen's spoon anyway and following after him and letting Allen into his space. Absolutely Allen's biggest hater here. Not charmed. Not smitten.
God people can see them, they're in the middle of the Grove there are people they can sEE THIS.]
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I’ll wash up everything tomorrow.
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Right.
[...]
You can decide where to put the basket and blanket, then. ...what's on your mind now?
[He senses... kisses, in his future.]
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Oh, this is the most important part of the date, you see. After you’re done with it, you have to kiss your partner at least a hundred times more than you did on the date.
Trust me, it’s a law or something.
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[Yeah, that's how that works, Allen obviously is quite familiar with the law for various reasons, Kanda!
Anyway, with their stuff in the kitchen (Link is going to have questions and Kanda doesn't give two fucks to answer), Kanda proceeds to walk out of it with Allen, give it about three and a half seconds, and then spin around in the hallway to kiss him.
Just like, y'know, right there.]
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He flings his arms around Kanda's shoulders, standing up on his toes for the kiss. He wanted to wait to be in the room so they could both sit, but sure. This works. ]
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Ugh. Hormonal. He wants to kiss Allen. They're in the hallway and not at all making it back to their room and he's kissing Allen, there are arms around his shoulders, and the angle that they're kissing at is steep due to the height difference. Kanda dips down a little lower to make it easier, and somewhere along the lines his hands are on Allen's hips and they're against a wall.
Hey when did that happen?]
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He'll move them to the bedroom eventually, probably. For now, he closes his eyes, kissing Kanda, and now biting his lip now that he's not on his toes. ]
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