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Yes.

[ Tosses a towel at Kanda's head. ]

Dumbarse.

Get the blanket, I think we're ready. I'll finish putting things in the basket and we can go find a nice spot by the River to sit.

[It clonks dully off of his skull and lands on the ground.

Kanda moves to go do that, leaving the basket in Allen's care.]

It's just easier, [he mutters as he starts walking out,] I can't feel bad when someone dies if I don't get attached. That's all.

[Death is inevitable. That's just how it is. Pushing people away at least makes the loss easier to deal with.

Kanda will be back in a second, he left the blanket out on the couch.]

[ Allen stops what he's doing to whip around and just fucking stare at Kanda as he's heading off. He huffs, and then finishes packing everything else up and grabbing the basket, only to chase Kanda down after. ]

That's bloody stupid! [ Thanks, Allen. ] Feeling bad is just a part of life! But that's why you take the bad with the good, you prick! Having that mentality- [ Pause. ] Why even follow me at all for all those months if that's what you really thought?!

[ He reaches up with his free hand to scratch the top of Tim's head and puts on a big smile. ]

I know I'm not going to have Timcanpy when we go back home. It's going to hurt when I go back. But I'm not going to push him away because I want it to hurt less. I'm going to make as many memories as I can with Timcanpy, that way I have plenty of them for when I go back. I'll be hurting when I lose him, but I'll have my friends, and my memories.

[ He puts his hand down to look at Kanda fully now. ]

I'll have you, too, Kanda. And... I'll make a lot of happy memories with you to remember when we go back! So, you're not allowed to say anything like that anymore!

[Kanda's eyes just say "can we not I'm fucking tired" as he looks over at Allen. Please. His PTSD. He doesn't know the word for anything going on in his head or why he makes so many excuses for Allen but please.

He folds the blanket over his arm and just sort of... nods, the fight relatively knocked out of him for now.]

Right. Whatever you say.

Let's get going. You can pick your favourite spot, or... whatever. [He doesn't know.]

[ Ah. That expression. He was trying to... be positive, but... maybe it was better to not say anything at all? Should he apologize? Should he tell Kanda he doesn't have to do this? Should he push more about it because it's important to Allen that Kanda doesn't have thoughts like that? Should he pretend it never happened? Should he try to gently talk about with Kanda??? He suddenly feels like he doesn't know anything at all.

... This is stupid, isn't it? Kanda had been excited to go on a date with Allen, and it hasn't even begun yet is already falling apart because of Allen. Brilliant... He grips the the handle of the basket tightly in his hands and laughs. Not because anything is funny, but because his brain can't process anything else to do in the moment. He's hardly aware of how he's feeling.

But, at the very least, it's a laugh that he uses to shake off this bout of negativity. Like shaking the snow off of a pine tree. He spins around and heads out the door. ]

'Course! I have just the place!

[ Spoiler: it's where they kissed and became "boyfriends" ]

[Wow, that's gay.

Kanda follows after, keeping the pace with Allen at his side but clearly a half-step behind so that he can be led along. He could hold Allen's hand, but he realises he's suddenly nervous about doing so in public, thinking to himself that it's probably what you're supposed to do on a date, that it makes sense to do so. But his palms are sweaty at the thought and then he's looking down at his hand like "why" and surely Allen is going to see that, and then Kanda looks at him and his brain short-circuits and he just sort of.

Brushes their hands together vaguely?? and does not grip.]

Great.

[GREAT, he says, like a goddamn loser. Why didn't he have a problem kissing Allen with tongue multiple times, but he has a problem with dating??? They made out on the goddamn greenhouse floor and Allen was so attractive yanking him around and Kanda was like, oh yeah this I can do, but he can't hold a hand?

On God.]

[ Allen looks back at Kanda briefly as their hands touch, confused. It's his human hand, even, since his Innocence is currently being used to tote around the picnic basket, so Allen doesn't think that's the issue. Is his hand still sticky from the fruit? No, no, he washed his hands before they left. So...? Maybe Kanda isn't sure if Allen wants to hold hands? That's stupid. Since when does Allen turn down physical affection, ever?

Anyway, he's reaching back to take Kanda's hand, giving a little reassuring squeeze. He'll do better! This is not going to be a failure of a date, he swears to God-

He will have to let go once they get to the spot, though, so. uh. Have fun with your minute of handholding, I suppose! ]

You spent shells on this stuff, didn't you? You should let me pay you back for it.

[He's NERVOUS!!! But at least he accepts the handholding, for however brief it lasts.

Last time they were in this specific spot, it was dark outside. Now it's the middle of the daytime, and Kanda can still clearly recognize that this is the spot where they rolled in the mud and kissed each other stupid. His face somehow manages to get redder.]

I don't think you're supposed to pay someone back for a date, Beansprout.

The date is free! The stuff for it had to be bought though, innit? I don't mind. I've been coming out here a lot to get shells in my downtime, so...

[ He lets go of Kanda's hand and finds somewhere to put the basket down briefly. Then he just kind of stares at Kanda for a moment, a soft smile on his face. He's... funny. To be so flustered over something like this. It's not like Allen can talk too much. After all, he's also got quite a bit of red to his cheeks. Nothing that rivals Kanda's, though.

He doesn't say anything for a few seconds, just... taking all of this in, and trying to swallow the want to kiss Kanda on his face right now. He'll clear his throat eventually, though. ]

Go ahead and shake the blanket out, I'll help flatten it.

[Kanda wants to argue further, but it seems like they're going to go in a circle, so he'll save it for now. He nods, a bit stiff, then whips the blanket out before laying it down. It's big enough for both of them and the basket, and it's definitely going to get stained with food and grass and mud now that he thinks about it, so it's probably good that Heimr pointed him in the direction of buying a specific picnic blanket after all.

He slowly sinks into a sit, and when the basket is set down, opens it up. He figures Allen will grab what he wants, so.]

So we eat and, what, talk? [Yeah Kanda. That's a date.]

Yeah, I think so? I think um... it's the "quality time" aspect of it that's supposed to be nice, though.

[ Because, like, he knows Kanda isn't much of a talker. That's always been more Allen's thing. ]

So even if we're not talking, it's just the spending time together bit that constitutes a "date", I think? I'm not a hundred percent sure, obviously. This is my first one, too...

[ Though, he does sit once he's helped smooth it out, immediately yoinking a sandwich to stuff his face with. ]

Edited 2026-03-28 21:15 (UTC)

[Makes sense. He nods, unwraps his own sandwich, and starts eating. Some silence passes as he watches the Seaborn blorp in the water, sometimes spotting Sinann going up and down the river with them. The breeze rustles the trees, the chatter of people out and about becomes a dull hum this far out, and Kanda looks over at Allen and watches him for a minute instead of focusing on his food.

Pretty.

After a minute more of eating, he mutters:]

I know I'm being awkward as hell today. But... thanks for coming out here.

"Today"? [ He reaches over to nudge Kanda playfully. Despite his teasing, he happily rocks himself from side to side with the sandwich lingering close by so he can take another bite when he finishes speaking. ]

I should be thanking you. This was your idea, after all. I didn't think you'd right consider a date with me at all, but I'm chuffed to bits you did.

I've been thinking of it. [He admits, as if it needed admitting when he was so lost in thought and just blurted it the fuck out like he did.] Ever since we got in that spat in our greenhouse.

[He likes Allen so much you see. And he doesn't know how the fuck to deal with that.]

[ It's normal for someone to say to their boyfriend that they like them and want to spend time with them. That is, in essence, what Kanda is saying here. And yet, somehow, Allen still finds himself shocked and embarrassed to the point his face feels way too hot. He was expecting Kanda to get goaded and bicker with him about the teasing, but this... ah...

His heart feels like it might just break his ribcage at this point. ]

Since... [ "Our spat", Kanda says, when what he definitely means is, "when we were both making out in the greenhouse". So... then... he didn't just leave. He was thinking about it. Fuck, okay- ] I-I was thinking about that, too, but...

Uh???? I didn't expect that from you is all! To say something like that, I... you've gone and given me the collywobbles, you know. I don't think I can eat like this...

[Yeah since they were making out in the greenhouse and Allen pulled his collar and made his voice all sultry for no fucking reason. That time, yeah. You know, every spat is like that obviously, so "spat" is a very good general term to use and not at all Kanda's way of beating around the bush. If he admits he likes kissing his boyfriend, he may very well go into cardiac arrest! Which would be bad, obviously, because he obviously cannot come back from that and obviously hasn't done that before or anything.]

You can't eat? Colour me shocked. [Please eat please don't make him think of making out even More right now.]

[ "For no reason" the reason was to flirt. He was flirting. Allen can give flirting, but receiving it breaks his brain a little. This is the man who got Hellishly flustered because Johnny called him his friend, after all.

He fidgets for a moment. ] For right now! I need t' calm down a smidge is all. Surely you've had those before, too. Like when your stomach gets all twisty?

[For no reason!!!!! There's no reason to take Kanda out like this okay he's Gay he likes Men he's having war flashbacks to the greenhouse and if he thinks about it too long he thinks he wants to Bite Allen (flirting).]

Yeah. You do that to me sometimes.

[Since it's honesty hour and all.]

...hehe.

[ Okay, he's delighted now, actually. He's so happy that he can make Kanda feel like this, too. It's a nice feeling, even if it makes him a little dizzy. This does spur him to stuff his face once again, though. He waits to swallow before speaking, of course. He's going to do his best to not talk with his mouth full while on a date. ]

Then I'll do my best to make you feel that more~! Maybe you'll be calmer with your stomach in knots or something?? [ Again, he's teasing. He is beaming at Kanda from that reveal, though. ]

Tch. I fucking won't, thanks though.

[He will not be calm. In fact—]

The more you try to rile me up, the more I feel feisty around you. And yes, "stomach in knots" counts as riling me up.

[Kanda, can you just like... admit that you're a little horny sometimes. Can you please.]

[ Allen is definitely taking “riled up” as “wanting to fight” so— ]

If anything I do counts to you wanting to swing a punch at me, then isn’t it better to not do that stuff.

[ He reaches in the basket for another sandwich. ]

[Grouchy grouchy grouchy:]

I don't want to punch you. It's... I'm bad at this shit, and my first instinct when you do anything is violence.

[Yes he knows this is bad this is why he's so flustered though, he doesn't have an outlet and so he has to feel his emotions.]

[ “Isn’t that why you wanted to beat the shit out of me when you and Johnny found me?” he wants to ask, but ultimately keeps to himself about it. He… recognizes that Kanda is being open. And that he’s literally admitting that most things get translated through a violence filter. ]

Don’t say you’re bad at this. You’re just new to it. I am, too, so it’s gonna be clumsy and bad. But… so long as we both know that, then it should be okay, right? We can tell each other how we’re feeling, and we can go from there.

[ Though, he’s still not convinced Kanda doesn’t want to just punch him all the time. But, as he said before, he’d also wanted to punch Alma so…????

Ugh. He doesn’t know how to make the punchy feeling into affection feeling, though. He barely knows how to do any of this. Shouldn’t he be doing something romantic? Isn’t that what dates are supposed to be about?

He contemplates this as he eats his food. ]

Besides… our kisses have been real nice. So you’re not bad at that.

INBOX

i waffled for a bit and decided this was the funniest thing to send. so.

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